South Park: The Stick of Truth Achievements Revealed
I continue to be in disbelief. South Park: The Stick of Truth actually looks like it will not be delayed once again, and that it will actually launch in time for March. The fact that the achievements have been leaked solidifies it, with a full list available from XboxAchievements.
Warning; there are outrageously hilarious, yet vulgar achievements in the following list.
| New Kid On The Block | 15 g | |
| Join the KKK. | ||
| First Day in South Park | 15 g | |
| Spend one day in South Park. | ||
| Gingivitis | 15 g | |
| Let Gingers bite you 3 times without blocking. | ||
| Day Walker | 15 g | |
| Defeat the Boss Hall Monitor while wearing freckles. | ||
| Made This for You | 15 g | |
| Fling a turd that you created at an enemy in combat. | ||
| Are We Cool? | 15 g | |
| Find Jesus while playing as a Jew. | ||
| Parkeologist | 15 g | |
| Open all garages in South Park. | ||
| For the Hoarder | 15 g | |
| Sell nothing the entire game. | ||
| Truth to Power | 15 g | |
| Fart on the Mayor, Father Maxi, Principal Vic, & Prime Minister. | ||
| Irritable Bowels | 15 g | |
| Shit your pants during a boss battle. | ||
| Dog Whistle | 15 g | |
| Fart on a canine enemy while in Gnome form. | ||
| Dragon Wrath | 15 g | |
| Hit 3 enemies with a single fart outside of combat. | ||
| Just Saying Hi | 15 g | |
| Fart on each available buddy in the game. | ||
| Re-Buttal | 15 g | |
| Interrupt 5 channel attacks with a fart. | ||
| Heisenberg | 15 g | |
| Defeat the Meth Tweekers while wearing the Evil Cartman goatee and the bald cap. | ||
| Shutout | 15 g | |
| Successfully block every enemy attack in a single, non-tutorial battle. | ||
| Stay Down | 15 g | |
| Fart on 10 enemies in the world when they’re knocked out. | ||
| Avenger | 15 g | |
| Defeat at least 3 enemies in one battle while your buddy is unconscious. | ||
| No Child Left Behind | 15 g | |
| Complete the game without ever ending a combat with a buddy knocked out. | ||
| Poco Chinpoko | 15 g | |
| Collect 5 Chinpokomon. | ||
| Chinpoko loco | 30 g | |
| Collect 15 Chinpokomon. | ||
| Chinpokolypse | 75 g | |
| Collect all the Chinpokomon. | ||
| Daddy Issues | 15 g | |
| Befriend your Dad. | ||
| More Popular Than Jesus | 30 g | |
| Befriend Half of South Park. | ||
| Junk Peddler | 15 g | |
| Sell 300 junk items. | ||
| Ass of Fire | 15 g | |
| Kill 20 enemies with Cartman’s ass. | ||
| Canadian Handshake | 15 g | |
| Fart on people 100 times | ||
| Animal Cruelty | 15 g | |
| Fart on animals 25 times. | ||
| Pulling Mud | 15 g | |
| Shit Your Pants in battle three times. | ||
| Shopaholic | 15 g | |
| Complete half of the available costume sets. | ||
| Clothes Whore | 75 g | |
| Complete all available Costume Sets. | ||
| Friends in Strange Places | 15 g | |
| Befriend Crab People and Underpants Gnomes. | ||
| Weapon Proficiency | 15 g | |
| Score 100 perfect attacks. | ||
| Skilled Defender | 15 g | |
| Block 100 attacks. | ||
| You bastards! | 15 g | |
| Have Kenny Die 10 times in battle over the course of the game. | ||
| Mastery | 15 g | |
| Unlock all the upgrades for one of the New Kid’s abilities. | ||
| Make it Rain! | 15 g | |
| Spend $500. | ||
| Full Arsenal | 15 g | |
| Collect all the weapons and costumes available in the game. |
In addition, there are 12 secret achievements for South Park: The Stick of Truth that vary from 5 to 30 achievement points.
There is something oddly poetic about the fact that the first achievement is to join the KKK. Taking that into account along with the amount of farting, defecating into your own pants, meeting Jesus as a “Jew,” killing enemies with Cartman’s ass and Ginger hate; what we have here is an authentic South Park experience within the confines of an RPG video game.
South Park: The Stick of Truth will be released on the PS3, Xbox 360 and PC on March 4th.
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